Reflection on learning experience by Judy Chiarelli

Reflection on learning experience

by Judy Chiarelli

My motivation to attend the Pastoral Care Specialist Training was rooted in the position I hold at the Bellmore United Methodist Church.  I am the church Administrative Assistant.  I am usually the first contact person that people encounter when entering the church facility during the week.   Not every person that contacts the church office is in need of pastoral care, however pastoral care skills are helpful in each and every encounter.  

           In the summer of 2013 while checking the church e-mails I came across an e-mail from the Long Island East District Office:   "Pastoral Care Specialist Training" a two year training program designed for pastors, priests, students and lay pastoral care givers.  I got one of those nudges from God.  I continued to read the e-mail and printed out the attached flyer.  I read it and reread it several times.  I spoke about it with my husband and discussed it with my pastor.  

At that time our pastor served a two point charge.  We were yoked with another church.  This arrangement limited the amount of time the pastor could be physically present in Bellmore during the week.  Taking the pastoral care specialist training would equip me to better assist with the pastoral care needs of our congregation and the neighboring community.  

           I have always had a caring heart and have always been a good listener.  I understand the importance of silence, andthe ministry of hearing someone's pain without feeling responsible to cure them.  Sometimes when people are speaking their words do not match the subtle signs they are giving with their facial expressions and body language.  I found the course text book "Strategies for Brief Pastoral Counseling" by Howard Stone to be a very valuable resource.  It included case studieswhich I found helpful in understanding the concepts that were being introduced.  In this last semester of Pastoral Care Counseling we have been using "The Complete Guide to Crisis and Trauma Counseling" by Norman Wright.  This book teaches how to counsel those in crisis.  How to be with them through their time following trauma.  This practical guide is one I know I will be referring to again and again through the coming years.  

           During the past two years I've learned to trust my feelings.  Peer group was such a valuable part of this process. Having what you feel is right confirmed by the group is so uplifting and empowering.  I've also learned that when you have different points of view it's okay.  Even if the only common ground is to agree to disagree.  This can be done leaving each person respecting the other.  I've learned that I need to work on building my confidence.  I have to lovingly say what's on my mind and not worry so much about speaking out and being wrong.

           The past two years have gone by so quickly.  At the start of this program I questioned myself on how well I would adept to being in a "classroom setting" after so many years had passed by.  At times it was difficult, but I kept going and for that I thank God.  I have learned so many things that I will be using in my position as the Administrative Assistant at my church.  I thank Pastors Joshua, Miriam and Penny and all my fellow students past and present for all the knowledge, love and support you have given to me and for all the smiles and tears we have shared together.

           Last Monday, May 11, the final day of classes our group made a commitment to  meet together on June 15.  I do hope we can continue to meet.  Having a peer group to meet with is something I think is not only beneficial for pastoral care givers but also necessary. The Pastoral Care Specialist courses have empowered and equipped me to better serve my church and neighboring community.